Reseña del libro "the devil's playground: redemption & deliverance (en Inglés)"
This story was written by both of us, Chris couldn't tell my story and I couldn't tell his... Dutchess Chris and I had a terrible fight on our visit, not about any of the women who were visiting him, nor about his having sex with them, which he thought I didn't know about, NO! I could see in his eyes that he was fed up with me and our marriage. He even went as far to grab my hand and yank my wedding ring off, as well as his own. He threw them across the visiting room, while other visitors and the C.O. watched his behavior, but no one said a word or interfered. Chris had a reputation of demanding respect. He was also angry at me because a man's wife had told me that Chris was having sex with other women. Chris beat the man in order to send a message that everyone should mind their own business when it concerns him and I, on a visit. When he acted a certain way, he was considered one of the most dangerous men in the prison. When I looked into his eyes I could see death. I tried to talk with him, but he wasn't having it. He just stormed out of the visiting room, while some other visitors and I were on our hands and knees looking for our rings. I don't remember driving home. I must have cried all the way. Once I walked into my home, I fell on my knees and cried out, "Why God, Why? Why are you allowing this to happen to me, I've lost everything, my kids, my ex-husband, family, and friends." All because I had chosen to live my life with a younger black man, who was serving 30-to-life in prison, a choice that was killing me emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. I tried to think of all the good times we shared, the times when I felt he actually love me the way I loved him. But now, all of that seemed far away. Now I had nothing but pain and grief. I felt the only way to get through this pain was to take my life. I cried, then I slowly took a whole bottle of pills the doctor had given me. Now it was only a matter of time before I could ask God face to face, why He allowed all of this to happen, as my eyes closed. Chris The visiting room was packed as usual with the worst scum of the earth. I had received an unexpected visit from Don and Dutchess. From the look on their faces, I knew something was wrong. I walked over to the visiting table, but Don didn't give me the warm, "hello son" greeting, but he cut right into me. I had to give him credit for a little man, he was determined to make his point. He was pointing his finger at me and started talking a mile a minute, "I welcomed you into my family like a son, and you betrayed me by having an affair with my wife. I'm telling you right now, don't you ever call my house and talk with my wife again. Do you hear me?" He shouted. Of course I heard him, everyone sitting in the area heard him. I looked at Dutchess to see what kind of expression she had on her face. When I saw she didn't agree with her husband, I let him have it. "Who the devil do you think you are pointing your finger at. Do you notice you have three fingers pointing right back at you? If you had been taking care of her, she would never look at another man, so this isn't my fault, it's yours." I shouted. Then Dutchess spoke up, "I didn't come with him and I'm not leaving with him. We actually had a race in separate cars to the prison, with him trying to stop me, but I beat him through the visiting room door." This changed the whole music at the party. Now I knew where she stood, and now I could pull my gloves off and let him have it.
